The St. Louis Nemesis
Being in the same division as the Cardinals, currently residing at the top of the WSJ Baseball Playoffs Hateability Index, is like having an older brother who is president of the senior class, all-state quarterback on the football team, letterman in four other sports, boyfriend of the hottest girl in school, volunteer at the homeless shelter, and accomplished violinist. You spend your whole life trying to measure up and you resent him, your parents, yourself, and the vagaries of fate for the certainty that you never can.
In my impotent rage, I now find myself rooting for any team that can be this year's Red Sox and drive a stake through their cornfed hearts, disfigure their gracious, bright-eyed, smug countenances, and knock them temporarily from their throne of self-satisfied superiority. I like the Giants a lot more than the Nationals, but I think the Nats are a better team; so I find myself pulling now for the Nats as the team most likely to keep the Cardinals out of the World Series. I have a lot of friends in Baltimore and always liked the O's, but the prospect of a KC-St. Louis series in which the Cardinals, like everyone else in baseball, can be flummoxed, baffled, and humiliated by NedBall is just too delicious to contemplate.
I hope I'm wrong, but I think the Dodgers are a lost cause at this point, Kershaw notwithstanding. That bullpen. Yeesh.
Update: Probably now is as good a time as any to resurrect this masterpiece of bilious anti-Cardinal rage.